Where Are The Men?

Oct 04

Where Are The Men?

Tue, 10/04/2011 - 12:09 — Thabo Mokete

"Excuse me, we know how to be men already!"

There is a blurring of sexual identity in our modern culture. Many will be asking, as they do already, where are the men? Can they still be found?

Manhood is a divine mystery! We thought that women were complicated, but that was because we had not sat down to study men. The biggest part of manhood is spirit, and less of nature1. This is contrasted with womanhood where nature tends to contend a lot with spirit.

Thus the spirit of manhood is being throttled today by a tidal wave of unisex culture. From being men, men are driven to be professionals, employees, individuals etc. Instead of being husbands, we become spouses. From being fathers, we become co-parents. We are already beginning to pay a heavy price for this culture by way of dysfunctional families and high divorce rates.

The industrialized society has no use for men or women for that matter. All it needs is employees and a work force. Unfortunately, this design means death for the family.     Manhood as well as womanhood are being sacrificed for economic ends. But we already know this, for Karl Marx already dealt with it in the Communist Manifesto2.

The domesticated man is the worst thing to have happened to the human race. This is because the spirit of manhood is not suited for the safety and comfort of the domestic environment. The domestic environment is heavily natural and oppresses the spirit of man.

The spirit of manhood is a going out spirit. A daring fearlessness. Bold to venture out and sail the dangerous seas of life. The spirit of manhood is centered on creativeness.

One simply has to look in our history pages at what men have been doing so far, before our generation. Men have been sailors, soldiers, missionaries in foreign lands. Men have hunted, created art, explored unknown worlds or even fought wars. What were they doing? Is there meaning in all of that?

What a lot of men do today is sit in a domestic environment, sometimes an office, together with women. They eat donuts, eat ice cream and pizza, watch soap operas, succumb to the wiles of any woman that comes across half-dressed. They sit in the houses and look after their own babies. Is this the man we want?

Sometimes this subdued setting is found in a lot of churches, political  and community structures, and taverns. Men sit for hours and hours in gatherings that have very little constructive purpose.

It seems to me that manhood is now overcome by womanhood within itself. In place of being daring and fearless, modern men have opted for the safety of the natural, sedentary domain of home and office. It is safe. 'We are building a secure future for our families', we say.

When it comes to the point where one has great security against elements of life, one must realize that he is actually in prison! Safety is prison for the genius, sacrificing spirit within men.

Men have to come out of the prison of safety that society has built for them! They have to recover the daring fearless spirit of hunting and sailing the world they once had.

They must stop needing the woman, but instead love her recklessly and fearlessly. Too long men have been in compromising relation to the woman. Men, we can never lose the women! They are here to stay. Instead of changing baby nappies, lead and teach the children.

When men are forced to stay in the sterile environment of home and office they tend to develop all sorts of neurotic tendencies. Rampant fraud, sexual depravity and abuse, violence to family, the list is endless.

Indeed, there is something altogether not well about a man who is always home, unless his workshop or studio is at home. When a man is always available at home, it may be a sign that he is not well.

Men have a destiny that is theirs and cannot be transferred to someone else. Their man identity is found in this destiny. Men preach of Jesus, but safely ignore His daring spirit and fearlessness in danger. His reckless and sacrificing love. His freedom of spending entire nights in spiritual ecstasy in the outdoors.

Men, we have fallen from glory. That we cannot deny. For the man who is afraid of looking at the dizzy height from where he fell, there is little hope he can ever return there.

This is the place in history where have a hunger never before seen of men who will lead. Those whom we call leaders have shown how little regard they have for leadership itself. They take office only to feed themselves. Those who could be leaders are too timid in the safety and comforts of domestic life.

Let us resurrect the spirit of our fathers and forefathers. Where is the sacrificing spirit of Steve Biko and the daring fealressnes of Madiba, or the ecstatic courage of Desmond Tutu?

Let us continue the work of building a new world that Jesus laid  foundation for by His selfless work of redemption. Let us leave behind the old consciousness of sin and embrace our redemption and the new freedom.

From redemption, we have a new destiny, not prosperity, as some are preaching, but glory. After all, one does not need to be redeemed to be financially successful. Are drug lords not prosperous? But the destiny that flows from redemption is glory3.

Glory begins now, when we return to the manhood that God intended for us. Manhood is glorious! It cannot be bought or faked. It is generated from the spirit within. The glory of manhood is partnership with God in building a new world.

We cannot be taught how to be man, there is no university that can unpack for us how to be man. It is inborn within us to be man. We were made to be man. If only we can reconnect with the spirit within us. The spirit of manhood in us is crying for redemption and freedom.

Are we listening to that cry. Can we free the man? Allow him to be what God intended? Being man is the debt we owe to ourselves, the world, the whole cosmos and God.

After all, anyone can be born male, but it takes everything you've got to be a man. The highest accolade that can be given to any male is to be called man.

1. Berdyaev, Nikolai. The Meaning of The Creative Act. London: Semantron Press, 2009.
2. Marx/Engels Selected Works, Vol. One, Progress Publishers, Moscow, 1969, pp. 98-137;
3. 2 Corinthians 3:16-19